When your gut feeling should be obeyed

Preve eve my friends, my home teacher rather sleepily calls me informing of an Elders Ward Party here in town.Figuring at least a free meal I went. The meal was all that was good about it. First the turnout was very poor, second the people there except two acted like they could barely stand this old biker being there, and so I was about to leave. Glad I hadn't at least for the 20 minutes I got to chat with HER. Her being Lexi. I knew she was not there because of the Uinta View Wards gathering , but to attend a party for fellow a Knyte who passed away, this past week. Lexi was so great looking flat outshown every woman there in both looks , poise and kindness. If only I could, but heart and all belongs to another now, but can't say I didn't secretly wanted to take a long walk with here to a more secluded place in that park. What I find strange is that of all people that would be there while I was there, and all was her. I mean this I think was no accident. What I also found was the fact it took an outsider of the Church to at least do more than recognize that I was even there. Sure Travis and his Dad said howdy, but would it have hurt any of the rest of them to at least be a bit warmer. Like I said on my cyber radio show earlier this morning, when the Bishop or whoever does the opening monologue to services each week and, says, " We welcome you this morning, hope you truly feel welcome." Is just plain BS. Sure I might have rubbed a bad sore with ones daughter when I got there, but what the hell did I know? No name tag or age on her blouse. BTW now days she dresses much more conservatetivly . Outside of her, tipped a fine job, thing to another returned lady missionary, but that was forgiven. At least on the surface. Bottom line, from now on as far as Church, I'm going to Sacrament meeting and Sunday School class. No more Priesthood, and dang well no more social functions. I might have to ROS(Remain on Station) for 8 more months here, but the seeing of here in my rearview mirror, is going to be the more joyful of all my life's happenings. Just like I said on the show, I put LDS away at age 18. And outside of a few more attempts to re-enter the denomination, the door has been slammed or at least firmly closed and the wagons circled. 
All the time I lived in Twin Falls for the two years I was there, never went to Church at least LDS , never got a visit from a Home teacher or anyone from the church, bottom line it ain't for me. Oh I still study my scriptures and all, but do I need to go to a place that flat out lies? Okay maybe not flat out, but don't shake my hand or be kind on the surface, and cuss me under your breath and from the back of your mind. My church is; the Amalgamated Church of Dixie and shall remain such. Maybe its time to readdress that excommunication idea again. 
When my friend Nate, Rick, and even Lexi treats me better than the people who are SUPPOSED to be Saints, does that not sound like the same gunk being bellered by those in DC? 
8 months and counting.
TTYLY